Sex Addicts – The Scary Reality

Articles, Australia, International, Understanding Addiction

Sex addiction is a very real condition. It requires serious and complex treatment if those suffering are to bring their compulsive sexual behaviour under control.

What most people think of sex addiction:

It is easy to understand why the majority of people will raise a smile or make some lewd comment if the subject of sex addicts is brought into the conversation.

They imagine sexy, scantily clad men and women available and willing to have sex at the drop of a hat, or cavorting nakedly while moving from partner to partner and having a thoroughly good time in terms of constant sexual experiences.

Because they do not understand the psychological and life affecting challenges those with this condition have they can only assume it must be a rather exciting addiction to ‘suffer’ from, when the reality is far removed.

What sex addiction is not:

It is very important to understand that those who have a healthy libido and enjoy regular and varied sex sessions are not sex addicts. Indeed, a healthy sex life is part and parcel of a happy and satisfying life.

When you feel comfortable with a partner, sexual experimentation will become something you are willing to participate in, and will discover many different ways of giving and receiving sexual pleasure. Such activity works to build stronger, more loving relationships.

What sex addiction is:

By its nature sex addiction is not an easy thing for others to identify. This is for a whole variety of reasons and the fact that a person addicted to sex is certainly not going to shout their admission from the rooftops.

Here are 5 signs to be considered if you feel the thoughts and actions of your sexual activities are taking over your life.

Constantly thinking about sex:

Those addicted to sex have constant, chronic and obsessive sexual thoughts as well as fantasies that are way beyond the realms of normality.

Such thoughts will simmer in their mind and very frequently burst to the surface leading them to:

Sex with multiple partners:

Sex addicts thrive on the thoughts and desires of having sex with multiple partners. This can either be individually, one after the other, becoming involved in group sex sessions and making it known to complete strangers that sex is the only thing on their agenda during a chance meeting.

It is known that many sex addicts will actually go to completely new places in their attempts to attract strangers for frequent sex sessions. Once such a conquest is complete they are already moving on and thinking of their next sexual association.

Placing themselves in danger:

It goes without saying that making it clear to complete strangers that you are immediately interested in sex is a risky business. This is from a violence perspective as well as the greatly increased potential of sexually transmitted diseases.

Accomplished liars:

It is the nature of a sex addict to become expert at lying. If they are in a relationship they will need to cover their tracks when late home or absent for long periods. It is also well known that most prostitutes do not take credit cards, so they need to have explanations ready as to what cash has been used for.

If single they would never dream of admitting to regular partners how many others they are having sex with, or the fact that as soon as this liaison is over they will be heading for the next one.

Illegal sexual activity:

While using the services of a prostitute is certainly not the biggest crime in the world many sex addicts have such strong desires that it leads them to far more serious activities such as having sex with minors, interfering with children, or using animals to satisfy their sexual cravings.

Complex treatment for a complex condition:

Addiction in general is treated by the addict committing to kicking their habit once and for all. Drug and Alcohol addictions are good examples of this.

This is obviously not possible with sex addiction as a person cannot be expected to forgo sexual activity for the rest of their lives.

What this means is that in-depth counselling sessions are required to help those struggling with sex addiction to re-learn what is classed as normal sexual behaviour as opposed to obsessive behaviour.

There is no quick fix to help a sex addict, although medication can often assist during such treatment. It is also felt that an extended inpatient stay at a rehabilitation centre is the most positive way for those with compulsive sexual behavioural issues to begin healing which will help put this damaging condition behind them.

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Anne -

Anne Lazarakis joined the DARA Rehab team from Sydney, Australia. She writes about addiction and mental health on a global, local and community level. She also relays personal accounts of substance abuse and recovery through the stories of our clients, their families and our own team members.

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